The following are excerpts from an article published by Mediate.com (https://www.mediate.com/articles/choose.cfm)

1.   Decide what you want from mediation

2.   Get a list of mediators

3.   Look over mediator’s written qualifications

4.   Interview mediators

5.   Evaluate information and make a decision

Selected excerpts:

1.   Decide what you want from mediation

• “Do you want a mediator who suggests options in order to help move the parties towards agreement?”
• “Or do you want a mediator who resists offering opinions so the parties feel responsible for their agreement”
• “Do you expect the mediator to help you stand your ground if the other person negotiates better than you or has more power?”
• “Consider your budget. How much you can spend might limit your choice of mediator or mediation program?”
• “Think about the dispute and the context in which you must resolve it. Is this a commercial dispute … or is it a divorce involving an emotional child custody decision?”

2.   Get a list of mediators

• In B.C., the most complete list can be found on the Mediate BC website (mediatebc.com)
• Other sources:  “Word of mouth… Ask a friend, your attorney, your therapist or another professional.”

3.   Evaluate Written Materials

• Mediation training
• Experience
• Written work
• Orientation Session
• Cost
• Other considerations

4.   Interview the Mediators

“Talk to the mediators in person or by phone. During the interview, observe the mediator’s interpersonal and professional skills.”

“Qualities often found in effective mediators include neutrality, emotional stability and maturity, integrity and sensitivity.” (my emphasis: D. Harvey)

“Look also for good interviewing skills, verbal and nonverbal communication, ability to listen, ability to define and clarify issues, problem-solving ability and organization.” (my emphasis: D. Harvey)

“Ask the mediator, How has your education and experience prepared you to help us work out this specific dispute?”

“If the mediator had formal training, did it include role play and observations of skilled mediators? (… training is most effective when it includes practice-oriented segments such as role play and observation)” D. Harvey Note: My training did include role playing with observations of skilled mediators.

“What values and goals do you emphasize in your practice?” For example, does the mediator encourage the parties to communicate directly with each other, or does he or she control the interchanges?” D. Harvey Note: I emphasize empathy and respect for each party to a conflict. Each party deserves to be heard. Most often, but not always, I encourage direct communication so that each party has the best opportunity possible to be heard and understood by the other, even if they still disagree. Fostering respect and understanding for ‘the other’ creates the best environment for fruitful collaboration in search of solutions that incorporate the most important interests of each of the parties.

The mediator should be able to describe his or her style of mediation and his or her role in the mediation process. D. Harvey Note: See the answer to the above bullet point about values and goals. For more description of my approach click here

Which ethical standards will you follow? D. Harvey Note: Ethical standards between being a Chartered Accountant and an accredited Mediator are logically identical: Being independent and objective, avoiding conflicts of interest, developing an understanding of the client’s needs, having plans and processes that make the mediations and audits most effective and efficient for a client.

Cost D. Harvey Note: $150 to $250 per hour based

5.   Evaluate Information and Make Decision

“Tasks which mediators perform in almost all mediations, include:

• Gathering background information
• Communicating with the parties and helping the parties communicate
• Referring the parties to other people or programs where appropriate
• Analyzing information
• Helping the parties agree
• Managing cases
• Documenting information

“Ask yourself which of the mediators best demonstrated these skills.”

Did the mediator understand (and respect) your problem? D. Harvey emphasis